I can vaguely remember the last time I encountered “apostates” during my years as an active Witness. I recall they made their presence known at a summer convention.
Whatever message they wished to convey seems to have been smothered by the abject fear I had at the time of any who oppose the organization. All I can remember thinking was, “why are they picking on OUR religion, when there are so many more things wrong about, say, the Catholics?”
This ability to think back to one’s time as an indoctrinated Witness, and contemplate what it was like to be in fear of anything or anyone opposed to “Jehovah’s organization,” is sadly a resource not always called upon by former Witness activists.
Sometimes, when one observes the methods used by former Witnesses in pursuing their activism, one is left wondering whether they can remember anything at all of what it was like to still be a Witness – terrified of even looking at the apostate bogeyman, never mind listening to his angry words.
More recently, videos have been posted to YouTube depicting what I am now calling “aggressive activism” – former Witnesses confronting JWs on the street or at places of worship; goading and mocking them with condescending and belittling words.
I have been familiar with this approach ever since I was a Witness, and truthfully I CAN sympathize with it. When you feel something has been taken from you that cannot be replaced, whether it is a family member (through shunning) or years wasted in cult servitude, it is difficult to stop the anger from spilling over and manifesting itself.
I have often imagined myself causing a scene at an assembly or convention – persuading myself that such actions would always be with the goal of waking people up, when in fact I have known deep down it would simply be about unleashing my primal urges for revenge on a group of bewildered and terrified cult victims.
Common sense should dictate that if you are going to set about the delicate task of untangling the amalgamation of years of extremely potent cult indoctrination, the way to do it is not through shouting and intimidation.
Arguments are not won by the one who can shout the loudest, but by the one who can present the most compelling argument when the opportunity arises. And no information can be absorbed in any meaningful sense by a victim of indoctrination if it is being thrust at them against their will. To suggest otherwise is to fail to grasp what undue influence is and how it works.
The problem is that so many examples of aggressive activism now proliferate that pointing out how deeply unhelpful and even counter-productive it is has become taboo among former Witnesses. I found this out to my cost recently when I dared to point to the elephant in the room in a fairly innocuous post on my Facebook page. Though my observations earned more than 300 “likes,” they also prompted a fierce backlash.
I was accused of being “judgmental” and “divisive,” and one website even briefly allowed someone to post a long rant about how I was a cyber bully and self-styled cult leader. This same individual went on to make further accusations about me that were downright slanderous, suggesting that I may be a sex offender and dragging my wife and baby daughter into his comments – and all because I had committed the heresy of voicing an honest opinion on what I consider to be an important subject.
The simple truth is that most people who know anything about undue influence and how pervasive it is understand deep down (even if they might be reluctant to admit it) that aggressive activism is at least potentially detrimental to the goal of awakening those who are indoctrinated.
True, everyone is different, and there will always be the occasional Witness who responds to being shouted at and ridiculed about his faith. But for every one of these there are surely dozens who will retreat deeper into their indoctrination when their cherished beliefs are threatened. It is therefore a numbers game, and logic dictates that if a certain approach is detrimental to the majority it should be dispensed with in favor of a more effective alternative.
And in what I call “strategic activism,” such an alternative is readily available.
The internet is fast proving to be Watchtower’s nemesis. Not only does it make objective information freely and easily available on a scale never before seen. It also makes meaningful activism accessible to almost anyone through the burgeoning social media phenomenon.
YouTube in particular now offers anyone with something to say the platform to say it in front of thousands or even millions. The most gifted convention speakers would struggle to boast the audience figures that are attainable from a well-put-together YouTube video.
Considering the opportunities now available to the modern activist, coupled with the advice of cult experts like Steven Hassan who urge a “strategic approach,” it seems only too obvious that the gung-ho, in-your-face methods of yesteryear are unnecessary, unproductive and obsolete.
But more importantly, for anyone who can remember anything about what it’s like to be a Witness, these brash methods are more likely to delay someone’s awakening than to accelerate it.
Taking to the streets with a handmade sign or a loudspeaker may feel empowering to someone who is bearing deep scars and feels the urge to act out in some way, but we owe it to those who are still inside to make it easier for them to leave – not harder. And by caving in to our primal urges for revenge, and shouting and goading perplexed victims of Watchtower’s undue influence, we squeeze ourselves snugly into the “mentally diseased” stereotype Watchtower has fashioned for us.
It is for these reasons that I am now distancing myself firmly from those who carry on aggressive activism in its various forms. I care too much about the fate of ordinary Witnesses and their children to endorse those who engage in such behavior, either tacitly or otherwise.
I know I am making enemies by taking this position – that much is clear from the abuse I have been subjected to already. But if there is one thing my opponents need to know, it is that trying to silence me only makes me want to shout louder. And exploring and promoting productive, non-confrontational ways to help wake up Jehovah’s Witnesses is, in my view, a cause worth shouting about.
Thanks John, for your thoughtful essay.
A few brief thoughts. First, in almost 40 years of work in this field I have seen just about everything and have myself been on quite the journey of dealing with my own cult involvement. Suffice to say, I was recruited in at 19 and out by 22, so my experience is very different from someone born in a cult and whose family and friends growing up are still in, and treating me as if I was evil/ sinner, etc..
That said- My thought is that being angry and being aggressive picketing and doing activism against one’s former cult might indeed be a therapeutic process of empowerment. After being in a cult where you had to suppress your thoughts, feelings and actions- it is quite empowering to overcome shame/ stigma, fear and “put it in the face” of a former guru or cult leader. I did many, many pickets and demonstrations- and got great satisfaction by going on TV to tell the facts about the Moonies. My subjective experience in 1977, 78, 79 was that I was “now going to use all of my public speaking skills and organizational ability I learned in the cult- and use it to help liberate my spiritual children and others in the cult.” It was largely helpful to myself emotionally and to warn the public and prevent others from getting sucked in, but as John mentions- it actually was counterproductive to helping active cult members. What worked best for them was to be thoughtful, respectful, kind and to live a very happy fulfilled life and “model” that one can leave the group and not have to leave God and being a good person.
I totally agree with the concept of strategic activism and teach it. It is my hope to teach ex-members of all totalistic cults how to do it- indeed my books and videos try to model what I have learned.
I am very excited the rights to my first book back, Combatting Cult Mind Control, and will have it out in an updated form by February 15th. it will be an e-book, audiobook as well as paperback and hope to get it out in many languages again. The old version (1990) is still very helpful, I am told, so my advice is if you want to read it, go ahead and read it and when the updated one comes out, it will have enough new in it to be fresh but reinforce the key points. (a hint- someone you know will be in the book ;-)
Steve
Thanks for dropping in and giving us this insight Steven! I can certainly see how picketing against cult leaders is an empowering process, and I know Ex-JWs have done demonstrations of this nature at Brooklyn headquarters in years gone by. But as you suggest, replicating this sort of activity against ordinary cult victims is not in their best interests.
I think most of us who have learned TTATT and dealt with it know any form of aggressive activism does not work.
But we understand why people do it. I felt a lot of anger having served faithfully for 16 years only for the house of cards come crashing down and when you have to deal with no paradise, no living forever, no answer to what happens at death, no answer to the purpose of life, no answer to all the injustices we see in the world it is a massive mind messup.
It takes people different amounts of time and ways to beat this and some just need to release it. We know attacking verbally other dubs or congregations is pointless but they do it because they are simply angry.
Most get beyond that and then feel pity/sorrow for those still in.
The guy recently on YouTube verbally abusing dubs is just wrong and in time he will shamefully regret it but it is his way of dealing with TTATT.
That is why sites like this one, and jwfact.com, reddit exjw, JWN and JWR are invaluable because as a community of exjw’s we can help each other through that initial anger.
I quote my own example in that I’m fairly hotheaded and wear my heart on my sleeve yet my still-in wife has remarked at my calmness when we discuss “the truth” because she expects me to react a certain and I don’t…this has benefited the situation in that she is starting to let seeds of doubt in…I would be surprised that these seeds would be as effective as they have been if I had released my initial anger when I realised TTATT.
I would also like to point out that having 3 kids these are my center point in my life and to Cedars with a new kid whilst I applaud everything you do here don’t get so sidetracked in all you do in the exjw community because your kid is your world, don’t let anything get in the way. If you get hassle or trouble just walk away from this for a bit.
There was a regional (formerly district) convention this summer where there were 2 forms of activist groups. The first were loudly protesting, which as an indoctrinated witness seems laughable and even faith strengthening. “We know we have the truth when we have such people opposing us, lead by Satan!”
The second was just a handful of people who quietly placed a one page info sheet on cars and quietly stood in strategic locations handing them to people. I’m sure more than a few curious individuals took one while the rest avoided it like the plague.
I agree with Cedars on his stance. Activism that he is opposed to does no good, while I completely understand the motivation that drives it.
Chris,
I agree with you, sir. A peaceful, mute protest is a very different proposition from shouting and screaming at people.
I think we need to look at the effects of any activism. Is it effective in waking people up? Is it received in the spirit in which it is given? In short, what is the fruitage of any activism we undertake?
Peace be with you,
Excelsior!
I appreciate that the ex JW community is diverse but its a shame we have fall outs. If only some how we could work together because i thought we all shared the same goal to expose Watchtower.Communication/getting along together is a good thing surely
Yes i know what you are going to say aaah well
Hi Excelsior
yes sure so maybe a peaceful physical protest is fine but ideally it needs to be well thought and planned out before hand
Its my opinion, that the hurt caused as you say by many things done to us by our former masters makes us so angry and vengeful. Yes it does, but its worth realising that years of careful and carefully constructed mind control by many things has took considerable time. With the warnings about how very bad apostates are from JW HQ and the closed ears policy is firmly indoctrinated, its madness thinking that shouting, or waving leaflets , will untangle , decades or carefully woven mind control. I at times have wanted to do terrible things, as my rage intensifies. But , in the long run, legally I may end up in some trouble, or personally I will look like the village idiot. It would accomplish nothing. However if others wish to pursue that course, then good for them, and good luck. Its just not may way. As for this phrase of Ex JW community, I am not sure who made the term, but I am just me. No community, the days of being pigeon holed for me are the past. If we are all Ex Jws , then of course we have things in common from a vast array of backgrounds and countries. That is it.
I am proud of you Cedars. A model for others to follow.
Those who reflect on their JW mindset will recognise that such aggressive activist behaviour serves to re-enforce the JW perception that it’s “proof” that they’re on the right and true path…that Satan and his agents are more desperate than ever because the time remaining to them in the “old system” is so very short. Venting anger and frustration may offer some ex-JWs a re-balancing of the power dynamic so long denied them. But, it’s unlikely to peel away those who are still “true believers” in Watchtowerism.
Further to my previous comment…
The faithful are conditioned to believe that ex-JWs MUST be evil and corrupt. The aggressive activist approach re-enforces this. One’s deportment (and the moral compass directing it) adds to the cognitive dissonance burden JWs experience upon discovering that kind, compassionate, and ethical people are also ex-JWs.
A very long time ago , I heard this expression “a man convinced against his will, is of the same opinion still.”
Self explanatory !
I’ve found that when discussing any subject (no doubt religion & beliefs especially), if you have to convince someone , sooner or later , they will revert back. Now,
all I do with anyone that WANTS to discuss my reasons for leaving, I simply refer them to certain information (websites) i’ve learned, so they can read it for themselves. I simply say the information is very interesting, content any longtime JW might find hard to believe about GB & WBTS. That’s it. I don’t want loved ones to think im crazy, nor do I want to make them crazy.
At least this visual form of “aggressive” activism demonstrates to the authorities that there is something which does not quite fit in the WT organization.
Many have so much suffered because of the family-destructive “shunning politic” of the WT that I would not judge those who feel like to have a part in that “aggressive” form of activism to pour out and express their legitimate feeling of injustice.
I know I was right about that all along. JWs should not be pushed or treated aggressively, because they highly stick to the principles of treating others the way you like to be treated. They live by these well-held beliefs. So with the right approach we should try to persuade those who are in this cult to leave now, or we push them further away to the JW indoctrination. They wouldn’t believe otherwise, because they’d always think that their paths are only the most righteous.
Treat them as you would like to be treated. And learn to speak in their JW language; otherwise they will spread like a bad disease. They will keep separating families, and they still label us as mentally diseased.
Peace and Love be with every one and protect your loved ones!
Observation and Facts:
1. jwsurvey.org was recently lock down for 24+-hrs. By the WT.
2. This confirms there IT dept visits formerly JWs web site.
3. These hits or web site visits are daily.
4. I recommend seize the moment, with “Cedars new subtle, new language, new world order approach. Push the agenda for reform and changes in policies.
5. You get WT & JWs to see the big picture at the end of the day.
Can this be done?
I remember a wise man once said, ,”I give you a “New commandment” to love one another”. The application? this wise man was replacing, repairing, and updating the Mosiac law with this new and improve approach.
This wise man also said, “love cures all”. He would not have said it if it had no value or application.
You know this, remember at the BM, they show the GB receiving daily letters.
Why not have everyone write letters to WT petition for reform and changes in policy. This could be an aspect of your strategy.
Just a crazy idea,
When I was in the society and saw this type of “aggressive” stance taken by “apostates” all it confirmed to me [at the time] was that they had an “evil spirit” which came from the Devil. Other times, I saw individuals just standing quietly with placards which gave a message quoting WT publications. It was these type of individuals that I felt did the best work with JW’s
There is an old saying, “Softly, softly catchee monkey!”
I have found that when having dealings with my JW family, if I take the bait to defend myself for not being part of the Org, I get “the door slammed in my face”, thus closing off any further opportunity for any communication.
It is easy to feel anger and feel incensed at the injustice, even though I know it is because they are indoctrinated, but responding negatively only has a counter-effect.
Instead what I try to do is show I love them and keep hoping that little things (e.g. the absurdity of JW-TV or media coverage they cannot escape from) will start to make them begin to question and so eventually awaken to TTATT.
This is one reason why I check out Cedars site – to see how things are developing in JW-Org.
The other reason is so that I can offer any little support that I can to others who are feeling the pain caused by the Org. I had no-one who understood what I was going through when I left many years ago and so I know only too well how lonely and traumatic it can be.
I have used the term ex-JW community before. I use this, not because I see it as “one big happy family” (swapping one cult for another), absolutely NOT! Instead I see a group of people, all with different stories to tell, who have one thing in common – they are EX-JWs.
This commonality offers an opportunity to help and show support to others who are also going through the same experiences that many under this ex-JW label have already been through. It also means that by sharing knowledge and experiences, others may be enlightened as to the reality of JW-Org.
It does not mean we all have to like and agree with everything said or done by all ex-JWs.
It’s sad that even the most least aggressive approach (Asking questions, something that they themselves encourage!) taken, still gets you viewed as a apostate on the same level as the ones out with their signs.
[off-topic link removed]
You have no right to call what you’re doing ‘activism’ if you are picketing conventions, barging into kingdom halls, and being generally abusive and aggressive towards the witnesses. What you’re engaging in is purely selfish and, while it may be cathartic for you, could not be more harmful and counterproductive for the futures of the witnesses still in the religion. You could be responsible for scores of witnesses never getting to find out the truth about the group they’re in just because you can’t work through the issues the witnesses have left you with in a productive way.
Shouting your head off at the witnesses won’t bring back all the time that you’ve wasted in the cult, it won’t undo all the child abuse atrocities the governing body and elders covered up and enabled, it won’t help free any minds of the cult’s influence. All it will do is solidify the witnesses’ belief that they’re a perfect little oasis on purity and togetherness in a sea of angry, shouty Satan worshipers.
You’re ruining things for everyone in your selfishness and pain. Please stop and seek some counseling for your anger.
Nice blog, Cedars.
I was hoping you’d come around to this way of thinking. Strategic Activism is a potentially much more effective approach. At the least, it is not counter-productive.
Oubliette
Arguing doctrine and scripture won’t work because they can’t be reasoned with, especially so at assemblies. I know because that was me too.
What I think I could have understood is that the love in totally conditional and that can’t be conveyed with demonstrations at assemblies. For instance, if one of my children decided they didn’t want to be one of Jehovah’s Witnesses anymore, according to the Society, I am to shun them for that decision. Wouldn’t I ask them why???? Why wouldn’t I be allowed to ask them why they made that decision? That to me, doesn’t make any sense and seems dictatorial. I for one, could never do that to one of my children and yet my husband said that yes, he’d do that because the Society tells him to do it. There’s only one reason the Society does that and it’s to keep dissidents quiet. That tells me that they are afraid of something and I am not a child that needs “protection”. I am old enough to not need them to tell me what I can read and what I can listen to and to whom I will listen.
The one thing my husband tells me that makes the Witnesses better than another religion is the “love” that they have for each other. I said that “love” is conditional and he said no it’s not. He said it’s unconditional and I said what about if a person decides they don’t want to be a Witness anymore, then how are you to treat them???? Aren’t you to shun them???? Yes, he said but that’s different. They made that decision to leave. It’s them that decided to not love Jehovah anymore. I said “no, it’s you that decided not to love them anymore.”
No matter how they slice it, the “love” is conditional. If you have a child, if that child wants “love” from their parents, they have to be in the “truth”. If any reasoning person thinks about it, that “love” also applies to themselves as well. They had better “tow” the line and if not, all that “love” is gone.
So, if it’s the “love” that Witnesses have for each other is what makes them better than any other religion, that “love” is real easy to show that it’s conditional and that kind of love is no love at all. People don’t like to think about it, but it must occur to them all the time but the Society keeps them so busy with meetings and service and assemblies and afraid Armageddon is coming any minute, that they force those doubts down. In the deep recesses of my mind, I knew it was true and sure enough, I found out. All that love was fake. I knew ahead of time, when I stopped going to meetings that I would lose my friends and so when that happened, I realized more than ever that the religion wasn’t a loving religion and it was a “works” religion. I saw the scriptures that said that a “works” religion was wrong but it had to forcibly be shown to me for me to see the stark reality of it.
It sickens me to think how everyone in this religion is playing a role to fit in. That is so sad to me. Nobody is allowed to show any real feelings or ask any questions, if they want to have any “friends”. What kind of parents would do that to their children? How can parents’ feelings be so clouded over by their first love to a group of old men in New York? They are under a very strong influence of a cult. Shouting at them is a waste of time and only makes the Witnesses think that the apostates are crazy.
When my husband starts complaining about anybody in the congregation or talks about how anybody doesn’t like this person or that person, I say to him “that sure sounds like conditional love to me” and he shuts up.
If something dramatic happens, like the Watchtower being investigated by the FBI for covering up child abuse or for hiding money off shore and defrauding the followers, I think the only thing we can hope for is one person at a time, coming out of their coma. If one person wakes up, then hopefully they might be able to either not raise their kids in the religion or be able to tell a parent or a cousin or a brother or a sister or somebody and one by one, the Watchtower will be found out to be what it really is. I see it happening faster and faster now with all the Youtube videos.
For me, I was at a really low point in my life and it was the religion that had done that to me. If people are happy in it, which a lot of them are, there isn’t anything in my opinion that make them change their mind. They will have complete faith in the Watchtower until the day they die and they will shun anybody who the Watchtower tells them to shun. Their first love is for the Organization because they believe with all their hearts that it’s “Gods” organization and they believe with all their hearts that they are doing the will of God and they feel happy.
Hi Anonymous.Your comment & observations are spot on!!! I empathise with you. I made comment in watchtower about proclaimers book stating Christ presence began in 1874 & I hoped the faithful slave had got it right this time with 1914!! Boy you could hear a pin drop.!!ho ho .Then after the meeting some turned their backs on me literally because of one comment which was pathetic.!!!
Hi Pickled Brain. All it took for my “best friend” in my congregation was suggesting her read “The Gentile Times Reconsidered.” She dropped me like a hot potato.
Hi anonymous .i am playing the double agent game. If the governing body want theocratic warfare two can tango at that.i was baptized over 30 years ago.i had a very good education & job & good parents(not in truth) but love bombed by bros. & sis. Fell for it hook line & sinker .two elders aren’t taking my comments in watchtower as one comment I made that those in the world would be better off dying one minute before great tribulation as one minute after great tribulation they wouldn’t have a chance of resurrection !!Boy more avoiding me after meeting.I spoke directly to one sister she looked terrified to talk to me!! But I am aiming to save as many as possible by working subtly from within.Always was a fan of john le carre spy novels.Love & subtle comments is my plan
Hi anonymous meant 2 elders not taking my hand in midweek meetings but at the moment watchtower overseer still taking my comments but only when no other hand goes up.theocratic warfare. Love it.Animal Farmageddon???
Hi Lloyd, I agree with you whole heartedly, and thanks for your words. I know you mean what you say, and I believe your position is truly in keeping with your personality.
I like the way you present and I know it brings great comfort and encouragement.
Keep up your great work. Regards, John
To all you lovely people who want REAL TRUTH!!! Many and I mean MANY are on anti depressants and either got chronic fatigue,M.E. Or Fibromyalgia .Why ??!! In one DISAPPOINTMENT ! Armageddon hasn’t come as promised within one generation!! I lived through 1975.i was having a bible study at the time First you had to be 15 years of age to see the signs in 1914 then 10 years of age then a baby .Then 1995.Bingo time ran out now interpretation changed to generation of contemporary wicked people & then 2010 overlapping anointed.!! Oh Please ??
CHILD BAPTISM=CRUELTY & BRUTALITY
Why?!!! JESUS our role model& example baptized at 30. Learnt a trade. & self employed in family business of carpentry .Why risk SHUNNING. & ISOLATION .a child gets baptized because of peer pressure from parents (especially elders kids)or other young ones or even if not peer pressure.younsters are NOT AWARE of full consequences !! Once they are shunned DEPRESSION sets in .i know of 2 suicides.
Cedar, you are a wise man. There are many smart and sincere people entrapped in the jw faith…I know, I was one of them. An agressive approach to would have made me dig my heels into the “faith” even more. I applaud your stance to speak your OWN TRUTH in a less agressive approach. Your strength shines….those that are truly searching will see that. Thank you ….I admire your light. Namaste.
I believe there is a strategic effort to divide the ex-witness community so it is less effective at achieving its goal. I don’t think much time or energy should be spent on in fighting and criticizing eachother’s methods. Different people will “wake up” with different methods. Those who are more comfortable with a milder approach need not participate with those who are more aggressive. I think any problem is better solved when approached in several ways and with several strategies all focused on the same ultimate objective. The ex-jw groups can work differently and still be united in their objective. Don’t let them use the divide and conquer tactic against you.
Hina – Forgive me for saying this, but I can’t help but wonder whether you’ve even read this article? You advocate this idea of “the ex-witness community” as though it is a mirror organization to Watchtower with imposed unity and mandatory praise of fellow activists. If that is the case, what is the mechanism for progress if a detrimental way of doing things creeps in? Who gets to decide which strategy should be used to ease the indoctrination of Witnesses – the one who has been around the longest or who can shout the loudest?
Once you accept the premise that not all strategies are advantageous, as is immediately evident from studying any literature on mind control or undue influence, how do we refine and improve our strategies if it is taboo or even heretical to criticize strategies that don’t work at the risk of offending people?
In the case of aggressive activism, especially recently videos have been uploaded to Facebook and YouTube almost as trophies, the scalps of the evil foe taken by apostate mercenaries, with the expectation that a torrent of praise and validation will be heaped on these brave warriors. The trouble is, in almost all cases the “scalps” are not those of Watchtower leaders – they are of ordinary Jehovah’s Witnesses; cult victims who need help rather than persecution and confrontation.
I won’t be told by anyone that I am not allowed to say “hold on, how can this be helpful for these bewildered Witnesses to be shouted at and intimidated?” I am far less concerned by a few hurt feelings and dented egos (of fellow ex-JWs who haven’t thought their strategies through properly) than I am about making the transition from indoctrination to freedom of mind as smooth as possible for Jehovah’s Witnesses. THAT should be our goal – not hurrying to shower consolation and validation on those whose methods of activism, however well-intentioned, are non-productive or even detrimental.
The Watchtower is an abusive partner/parent and a bad one.
Obey our authority or else.
Anger after abuse is perfectly understandable.
As someone said on this post, ‘ it’s a part of the grieving process’.
At some point in that process we’ve all been alone. God that’s painful.
Its nice to know that if I meet
jws you , on this post, would understand how I felt. What it’s like to be looked down on e.t.c.
Once I disassociated myself regarding of a number issues including child abuse and sat, the very next week, in he front row of the KH
for six months.
To be fair to them, even though I looked like an idiot and was no doubt weekly entertainment, they reinstated me. I didn’t back down. This was a point of principal to the very end and I wasn’t going to budge.
Once I was reinstated I didn’t return.
Its not the local jws fault, though they maybe involved, it’s the Watchtowers policy’s and the arrogance it displays and how that permeates downwards. If you speak for God act like God.
So a big thanks for everyone’s understanding and support.x
.
The Watchtower is an abusive partner/parent and a bad one.
Obey our authority or else.
Anger after abuse is perfectly understandable.
As someone said on this post, ‘ it’s a part of the grieving process’.
At some point in that process we’ve all been alone. God that’s painful.
Its nice to know that if I meet
jws you , on this post, would understand how I felt. What it’s like to be looked down on e.t.c.
Once I disassociated myself regarding of a number issues including child abuse and sat, the very next week, in he front row of the KH
for six months.
To be fair to them, even though I looked like an idiot and was no doubt weekly entertainment, they reinstated me. I didn’t back down. This was a point of principal to the very end and I wasn’t going to budge.
Once I was reinstated I didn’t return.
Its not the local jws fault, though they maybe involved, it’s the Watchtowers policy’s and the arrogance it displays and how that permeates downwards. If you speak for God act like God.
So a big thanks for everyone’s understanding and support.x
.
Just a little bit more info on what happened.
So there I am sat on the front row of the KH , all empty except for yours truly:-) (and two rows behind)
Towards the end of six months the society sends a senior member to give a talk at our
K hall. He tells the audience that their reputation for gossip and slander is legendary and that people on the circuit avoid them! I was cracking up lol. The rest of them looked like they’d been slapped with a wet fish.
I was reinstated the next week
Silent protest does work:-)x
It is not just the child abuse and the policy’s
The Watchtower abuses minds. That’s the fight. A war of information.
Hina, I agree with what you say, and would like to add to my previous comment. I have always thought that squabbles and discord amongst ex-JWs plays right into the hands of JW-Org and weakens the objective to expose TTATT and free our family members.
I think possibly that some lose sight of what is trying to be achieved. (That is definitely not aimed at Cedars btw)
Anonymous, you hit the nail on the head as usual. I have maintained this for a long time about JWs only having conditional love. The comments made by your husband echoed exactly some of the comments made by my family to me.
Sorry, should just clarify the part I was referring to in Hina’s comment – “I believe there is a strategic effort to divide the ex-witness community so it is less effective at achieving its goal… Don’t let them use the divide and conquer tactic against you.”
I am not advocating using aggressive tactics by any means, I don’t think they work anyway.
Pickled Brain – The Trojan Horse approach is a good plan.
It’s been a process for my own awakening from indoctrination. With it being relatively recent, I can tell you one thing… information is the key. If the information is available, such as what JW Facts provides, witnesses can wake up on their own with little to no approach. The organiztion shoots itself in the foot with it’s own silly policies and doctrinal non-sense. Members are constantly questioning things in their head but keep it in check because they have belief in a deity that would be disappointed in them if they question his agents. So half the battle is won with little effort on our part. All we need to do is provide avenues for individuals to find information and support to help them through when something drastic enough happens in their life for them to take it a step further in realizing their delusion.
As regards aggresive activists, I’m sad they choose to handle things in such a way. I came to realize that they’re are ones who wake up and still believe in God and the bible… Yet others like myself, have come to be Agnostic. This already will naturally cause a division among ex-jws. I have no quarrel with anyone, but it’s a bit foolish to think we would all be united to take down “the Watchtower.” In reality we will hold differing views. Personally, I feel all religious indoctrination is dangerous, not just the Watchtowers. It just happens to be one of many high control groups among religions.
I hope one day we will all progress and we see the bigger picture. The one of self accountability, of creating our own future as a race versus belief in divine intervention.
Thank you for your comment, and kind words about my work. However, I don’t think you can describe strategic activism (the opposite of aggressive activism) as a single-pronged attack. It incorporates a number of differing strategies that are tried and tested at giving people an escape option from their indoctrination. I would also strongly advise against people going back into the organization in efforts to sabotage meetings etc. It simply doesn’t work and causes unnecessary stress and heartache. Only in the most extreme cases where an individual needs to get reinstated before quickly fading in order to have contact with his/her family can I imagine such a strategy being advisable. There can never be any such thing as “change from within” or reform of the organization. Successive generations of Watchtower leaders have calibrated the organization to entirely preempt any such possibility.
Gently coax our loved ones out .Years have been spent Brainwashing them.it takes time & patience for the deprogramming.we understand the pain & anguish of feeling duped .All of us need to to be KIND just like the society says we should be to unbelieving spouses,likewise to those who are trapped in the organization .
Nate, whilst I agree with you about other religions, – it is not feasible to take on the task of enlightening the entire population about religious indoctrination. Admirable though it may be.
This website deals with JWs and although this may sound selfish, but my reason for being interested is because of my trapped JW family. If it were that I had merely escaped and had nothing else linking me to WT, I am afraid I would not have the same interest, although I would of course discourage anyone from becoming involved. I would probably just cast WT into the same category of other religions, cults and organisations.
When I read the comments on this site from other people I see a common thread – and that is the desire to have their family ties restored. To achieve this you are right – knowledge is power, information is the key.
By mentioning the Trojan Horse, I wasn’t meaning for us all to return! – Oh my goodness, what a horrific prospect. I certainly couldn’t bring myself from setting foot inside the KH ever again, no matter how much I wanted to rescue my family.
However, I do know that when someone I knew who was an elder began to awaken, by telling others in the congregation about what he had found out many other Brothers and Sisters had their eyes opened and there was a mass exodus from that congregation. So working from within accomplished more than standing outside with a Placard.